Things I Can Do To Smarten Up (A Bit)
April 14, 2009
I think summer is that time of year when one’s sole existence is dedicated to sleeping until noon and obliterating all useful information you’ve learned the past school year. But while that sounds like a capital idea, I’m tired of being completely useless around the house.
- Read/research on Romeo and Juliet.
I really don’t know anything about these two epic lovebirds except that they ended up dying “because of their eternal love each other” (How disgustingly romantic) and that their families were the biggest of mortal enemies. Then what?
(What is up with their names? Juliet Capulet? Romeo Montague? It’s like naming me Kia Banana.)
- Read the newspaper. Bask in the warmth of current events.
My mom nags like the plague. She thinks I don’t know who the president of the United States is. I’m perfectly aware that it’s Oprah.
No?
- Take up an instrument – any instrument.
- Watch Discovery Channel for a change.
My brother and I watched this documentary called Man vs Wild. It’s about learning to survive when you find yourself in a rut away from the comforts of home and a decent bathroom. The guy ate goat testicles, drank elephant dung juice (He squeezed the water out of elephant droppings) and jumped into a bog (which he said smelled and tasted like a thousand cities worth of sewage) voluntarily. What say you?
- Research on the holocaust. Get a decent WWII movie while you’re at it.
Would it be totally inappropriate if I said I loved that part of history? What I mean to say is that I like reading or watching films about the second world war. Hitler’s anti-Semitism movement and supremacy propaganda were the most inhuman undertakings the world has seen. At what point does a man lose all sense of compassion and humanity?
- Learn more about photography.
I started taking up lomography last year and have become a proud lomo junkie. It’s costing me a fortune, but as I always say: It’s worth every penny.
I’m still dreaming of an SLR though. I’m thinking a couple years of starvation will do it. My parents are having trouble swallowing the amount of dough it will cost to buy me one. But I’m keeping my hopes up.
- Listen to tunes aside from rock music. It doesn’t even have to be classical.
- Learn to cook. Dumping leftovers in a pan does not count.
- Get some exercise. I’m serious.
Okay. I’m getting miserably bloated. All I do is look forward to the next meal. I’m starting to miss volleyball practices. I even miss being sore from all the running and crawling.
- Get some sleep. You look like the walking dead. It’s unbecoming. Stop sleeping after midnight.
To my first list, Folks. Wish me luck.
Reading the newspaper is so depressing and doing it everyday will bound to make you cynical (especially the local news). I would know, I’ve been reading online almost everyday since I started working.
Man vs. Wild is amazingly disgusting at times.
#5 – your bros can help you with these. Those war freaks.
And if you read the news, you’d realize that while what Hitler did back then was cold-blooded, there are a lot more like that happening today all over the world. Rwanda? Darfur? It’s disgusting.
#9 Tell me about it (pinching flab). Sigh.
“What is up with their names? Juliet Capulet? Romeo Montague? It’s like naming me Kia Banana.”
Wahahahahaha! I guess you’re just LUCKY! Shakespeare wasn’t that creative afterall. We definitely could write better literary works…at the very least come up with decent names.
“My mom nags like the plague. She thinks I don’t know who the president of the United States is. I’m perfectly aware that it’s Oprah.
No?”
It is comforting to know that it is not just me!
“My parents are having trouble swallowing the amount of dough it will cost to buy me one. But I’m keeping my hopes up.”
Well…since you are a FULL SCHOLAR (Congrats!)…A few semesters of being a DEAN’s LISTER might make them given in…HOPEFULLY!
Unfortunately for me, I really need to work my ass for one.